Retracing Footsteps

From where I stand I can look out over the precipice and see oblivion. Another step on this long and dangerous journey would have been the end. There is no room on the ledge for both feet, for the other is already headed in the opposite direction. I turn to retrace my footsteps and see that my entire journey has been surrounded by the abyss. A single misstep would have taken me over the edge.

There is life to return to. Standing here in the bitter cold it warms my heart to know that I'm going back to the path that needs me. There are those that care for me waiting there too. Though no less dangerous now that spiritual path is one of peace and awareness. My true life waits for me, and with every conscious decision I grow closer.

Everything in life is a circle returning onto itself. I'm now no more than a pattern. I'm sending my feet into steps that they only just left, and yet I only remember them when retaken.

In this awareness I find my mind, abandoned to take part in the noise surrounding my every step. Along this path I discover my heart, bitter and frozen to keep from being broken. With every step I begin to feel my body, abused and polluted to keep from being alive.

I can see now that I've glossed things over, sending them backward, so that they might lose themselves in the clutter of so many unanswered questions. I've covered my life this way - putting my hands to tasks that I pretend need me - when it is I that needed them.

While the emptiness inside us remains unfilled, what could ever change? If you don't fix the real problem, you'll just create them again.